Doudou: up to what age
can a child have one?
The comforter is like a pacifier: many parents wonder when their child will be able to part with it. The answer to this question is quite simple: he decides. Indeed, this stuffed animal that he has kept since his early childhood will lose its interest over time.
As a parent, your role is to support him in this phase. We tell you everything about baby comforters, from their need to the act of separation.
The role of the doudou explained
The comforter can be anything. Generally, it is a plush. However, some cherubs use a flat comforter in the form of a pretty and soft piece of fabric. There are no rules when it comes to your little one's favorite companion.
In any case, the cuddly toy is an important object for the growing child. Often an element of reassurance (this is also why he asks for his cuddly toy to sleep or when he cries), he can also be a real playmate.
In all cases, the cuddly toy represents the infant's ability to become attached to others. For psychologists specializing in early childhood, it is the first step towards emotional independence and emotional development.
Doudou: until what age?
Some parents are alarmed that their child still has a cuddly toy at 8 years old. That shouldn't worry you. Moreover, some adults still have a comforter which symbolizes, in this case, a transitional object or a lucky charm. It allows them to keep a child's soul and symbolizes their attachment to their parents.
Is it serious doctor? No, not reallyt. Provided that the child can separate from his cuddly toy when necessary. Thus, although as a general rule, a child tends to detach from his cuddly toy naturally around the age of 6, he can keep it at home to sleep or reassure himself in case of great grief. On the other hand, the comforter cannot accompany him everywhere. The child must also learn to manage separation with this intimate object (and, by extension, with his parents).
The comforter at home: yes. The comforter at school: no.
How can parents accompany
their child in separation with the doudou?
I persist and sign on the fact that as a parent, you should not be alerted if your child keeps his comforter for many years. Moreover, even when he is separate from it, keep it preciously. Your son or daughter will be happy to find it many years later (he or she can even give it to his or her own child).
In any case, you have an important role in separation with cuddly toy. Obviously, it is out of the question to confiscate your toddler's cuddly toy. The rupture would be too brutal (and can generate trauma). The goal is to do it little by little so that the detachment takes place gradually.
Here are some steps to follow to facilitate this transition period:
- Start slowly by offering to take your comforter in the car, but not outside (which could, as a bonus, get him dirty);
- Then, ask him to leave the comforter at home;
- After the stage at home, offer to leave cuddly toy only in the bed;
- Finally, ask him if he would like to put a cuddly toy in his toy box. This way, he can easily retrieve it if necessary.
- When you see that your child begins to neglect it, you can put it away for good (but always keep the possibility of taking it out, just in case) .
Once your child is totally independent, the cuddly toy will only be a vague memory. Even if some relapses can be expected in the event of minor anxieties or significant events.
In any case, do not force things and give your cherub time to acquire sufficient maturity and autonomy to separate from this intimate object.
